Conversation with Dr. Taper.
April 1, 2012 § 6 Comments
Me: Doc. Where have you been?! I feel like we haven’t seen each other in ages!
Dr. Taper (heretofore, ‘Dr. T’): B. Give me 12 breaks. You’re the one who hasn’t been answering my calls. And what are you doing still in running clothes?
Me: Well, I’ve been busy. And these are comfy. But I really am ready to hear what you prescribe! For real. I’m going to do it.
Dr. T: I’ll believe it when I see it. For starters, you’re going to have to start sleeping in a little bit.
Me: (happy dance)
Dr. T: And those feet of yours–all those little aches and pains you’ve been ignoring? Time for those to get some TLC.
Me: (sideways glance) Um…TLC? I forgot what that is, actually. It’s been awhile.
Dr. T (rolling eyes): An ice bucket would be a good place to start. Then get out your compression socks and wear those around the house. Oh, and there’s this other thing – I don’t know if you’ve heard of it – but it’s called a pedicure.
Me: I can’t–
Dr. T: I know, I know, you can’t afford one. I’m going to give you a tip. Are you ready? Do it yourself. First, buy yourself a tennis ball and use it to massage your foot for a good long while. You can even watch a TED talk during this if your need for productivity gets the best of you. Then, lotion yourself up, rubbing deep into the callused places. This isn’t going to ruin your proprioception, so calm down. Lastly (and this has no benefit whatsoever for your running–but mental health is important, too!), why don’t you paint your toenails, Bek? They deserve it.
Me: (sheepishly) Thanks, Doc. I really am so glad to see you and I’m going to do everything you say.
Dr. T: You better. None of this I’ll-prove-to-the-world-I’m-superwoman stuff during the next two weeks. Here’s your prescription.
Focusing on school Catching up on Prison Break Napping Chocolate Foam rolling Remembering to take your vitamins Hanging out with friends Going home for Easter